Sex and the City and the Crappy Posters.

June 5, 2008 at 5:26 am (movies) (, )

The Sex and the City movie comes out today. I’ve never watched the series, but I would have considered going to see the movie. That is, if that damn poster hadn’t been up everywhere.

 

It’s just so baaad and lazily done. A poster should have more than text on it. There are only two things they’re using here; the name and Sarah Jessica Parker. Granted, there are a lot of people who know and like those two things [although most of the fans of SJP love SatC anyway, so maybe putting her on it was a bit redundant] but a poster should be able to make a movie look enticing on it’s own merits. This was plain laziness, they didn’t even try to make it look good. Now, I have to see this poster at least five or six times a day, which, without even seeing it, has led to me hating the movie, SJP and especially Carrie, ‘cause of that tagline “Get Carried Away!” I didn’t even know her name was Carrie before this! I was happy not knowing! Although you know what would be cool, if she became more like Stephen King’s Carrie. Yeah! Her love interest could slight her and she’d use her latent telekinetic powers to give him a gruesome death, and then go on a rampage and destroy all of New York! Then something would injure her, and eventually her three friends would find her and get her to stop, but it doesn’t really matter because then she dies. SJP could branch out, and everybody would be so pissed off! Huh, I seem to be getting my Tom on.

 

 

 

 Okay, so I know that saying “don’t judge a book by it’s cover.’ And I’m not, I don’t think that it’s a bad movie or that SJP is a bad actress. It’s just that having to see this at least five or six times a day has led to me becoming so gorram sick of it all already that I couldn’t stand to go in and watch it for another two and half hours. So don’t think I’m saying anything bad about the actual movie or series. It’s just the poster. Or rather, posters, because the others are pretty shit too. And so are the promo pics they released. God, who was supposed to be advertising this movie? They should thank god that it doesn’t really matter since it’s the cinematic sequel to a very popular show and hordes of people are going to see it anyway. Otherwise, those damn posters and pics would have made it a bomb, no matter how good it was. So, who wants to play a game of Bag The Poster/Promo Pic?

 

 

I love how “Sarah Jessica Parker,” is just spashed in huge letters across the top, and then the other three get names half the size and separate. Like, maybe they should just shove ‘em in that tiny little wordy bit where they list the entire cast and crew and nobody ever reads it? There’s no need to promote them so much. [/sarcasm] Furthermore, for people who dislike Carrie – from what I hear there are quite a few – this would be a major turn-off, because it’s making it look like she’s the only one that matters. Gawd. We haven’t even gotten to the mistakes yet. For example, look at her right hand. You can juuuust see it, it’s almost completely transparent. So either Carrie’s a ghost, or has the power to become invisible. Hey, I’ve heard the show was like a fashion landmark, the clothes would be even more noticeable if there’s apparently nobody in them.

 

Then after the tiny little wordy bit, everything becomes heavily tinged with gray. Because of this, I didn’t get that she was carrying a shopping bag until a minute ago, and was wondering if that was supposed to be graffiti someone had done on the road, or if it was in there by accident. Although she’s not carrying it beside her so much and behind her so this one can also be blamed a little on the person who designed the shot. Oh, and btw, if you don’t get she’s carrying a shopping bag behind her, it makes you wonder exactly what her hand is doing behind there. My best guess was grabbing her own ass.

 

If this was just some random movie, what would you think it was about based off this poster? Perhaps a woman who gets hit by a taxi, because there’s one right behind her about to hit her and there’s nothing else here to explain the premise… Yeah. Nice job poster concept morons! Actually, if they replaced day with night, the taxi with an ordinary car and SJP with a middle-aged, depressed homeless guy, they could pretty much use this as a poster for that movie Stuck. I hope not though, I like their poster. It’s tabloid-y.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It certainly carries a different tone to the trailer, but I think they’re both pretty cool.

 

This is taking a while, so I’m going to pick up the Bag the SatC Poster game again later, ‘kay?

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